i am in the mood to write today.

somehow, the thought of not being able to do the things only you do by yourself scared the s*** out of me. like writing the blog that i have forgotten for so blardy long. like downloading and reading all my trashy books and ebooks. like rolling on the bed under the covers in an air-cond room after hubby went to work, not really sleeping but just being..

yesterday i went out to do errands by myself. i didnt realize it until i got back home that i wanted to do it rather than i have to do it. i shouldnt do it coz i'm so sarat already and cant even breathe properly let alone managed to do all the errands that i planned to do if i were not preggers. all of the cashiers and sales person were commenting "oh beraninya u keluar dah dekat nak bersalin ni"

i was like "huh?"

what should i do then? stay at home at wait? i am already freaked out with all this and you want me to sit alone, at home, nothing to stop me from thinking of all the possible potential disastrous antics i could "inflict" on my child as he grows up and freaked me out some more???

eeeeiiikkk.... thank you but no thanx. i rather have shortness of breath from walking too much than that.

tonight, we are going on a date. our last one before everything changes.